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 Jake's Clever Banter First off, regarding Tim's claim that we're at the end of the EVA story arc, we're actually one or two strips away. We do have to explain how they get BACK, right? In any case, yeah, it took too long, and hopefully the next story arc will be a bit more fun. And now, the opinions. For starters, I just came back from Supertroopers, which despite being one of the funniest movies I've had the pleasure of seeing, ain't doing too well in the box office. Well, poop. Saright, though. This one's destined to be a cult classic once it hits DVD (And you can bet I'll be there). Also, I've been beefing up on Kevin Smith flicks in preperation for watching Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back. My opinion (Like you care)? Well, I saw Dogma a good while ago, and thought that was very good, albeit vastly overrated. Clerks is damn funny. Mallrats I haven't seen yet. Chasing Amy had to be one of the most moving... uhhh... movies I've ever seen, if not for the ending. And Jay and Silent Bob... I'm not done watching yet. In the videogame world it seems Xenosaga has been released in Japan, with a beginning consiting of long load times, and even longer cinematic custscenes. But that I don't mind, as long as the story is good (And at least in part, decipherable). Animal Forest coming to the US. D'care. Sega World Series Baseball XBox exclusive. D'care. Gitaroo Man continues to get reeeeeally good reviews. D'care. Hmm... Oh, and to answer your little "I need to get" sheet, Tim... Maximo, definetly. You'd love it. Super Mario World, well, they fudged up the sound, but Mario World is still Mario World. Rez is so unique you have to at least play it, so I'd say yeah. State of Emergency, a lot of people are saying gets repetitive later on, so I'd say rent first. Zone of Enders GBA Idunno. And Gran Turismo 3... Shit, I know you're no huge fan of the series, but I swear, for $25, you should try. Anything you forgot? Hmmmm... Nothing I can think of at the moment... Dammit... I know I'm forgetting something. Shit, Idunno. 2/27/02 - It's Wednesday already? Hmm... well, despite that you don't DESERVE it, here's your new comic anyways. I'm sorry, but I've suddenly become extremely uncomfortable at how twisted the world has become lately. What frightens me in particular is the way in which marketters and advertisers seem to bend time to their will. Take, for example, the latest EGM. Now, for starters, flipping through this I realize I can no longer trust their reviews- They're so off-base from what everyone else has been saying so as to warrant a raised eyebrow. This, however, is not my problem. In the back of this particular issue, they have a tiny secrets area for Super Smash Bros. Melee and, lo and behold, one of the secrets they list is the ability to open Sonic the Hedgehog and Tails as playable characters. I find this odd- it would be an obvious April Fools joke, but we're not in April. Turning to the spine out of curiosity, I see that I am in fact reading the April 2002 issue of EGM. In February. Huh? Now to be sure, most of the games reviewed haven't been released yet, but most are due out through te beginning of March. And here's the kicker- small print says to remove the issue from shelves on April 2. Now, granted, we've been seeing sports games with the year number shifted one ahead for decades, but it is just outright bizzarre to have an April Fool's joke played on me in February. No doubt my October isue of EGM will wish me a Merry Christmas... Meantime, the videogame world seems content with fairly low-level mini-buzz, with news that's nice and all, but not hardly jaw-dropping. It seems another Spyro game is in the works for PS2 (Big surprise), and it looks decent. Judging from screenshots, the new Superman game for PS2 could either be really good, or a disastrous dive into the exact same game we saw on the N64. Yamauchi says he'll be retiring mid-year (And I can't think of a damn thing that'd be appropriate to say...). The XBox has reputedly only sold about half of it's initial Japanese launch shipment, with an average of only 1-2 games per unit. And MS looks to be bringing over their interesting "Have a Mice Day" to American shores as "Sneakers". Bleh. Nothing spectacular there, I know. There is one nice note, though. For the longest time, Sony has been re-releasing huge PSX hits as "Greatest Hits" titles at $20 (You know- the ones with the ugly green "Greatest Hits" ribbon at the side), and now they've announced they plan to continue this tradition on the PS2 with a series of "Greatest Hits" titles (With same ugly green ribbon) at $25. The initial titles to be put on this list are ATV Offroad Fury, Gran Turismo 3 A-Spec, Twisted Metal: Black, and Dark Cloud, all of which got tremendous critical acclaim (Except Dark Cloud, which was supposedly good but not great). As I already have Dark Cloud and GT3, I'll definetly be picking up TMB and ATV, and Tim- Get Gran Turismo 3, for crissakes. Although games like Madden 2001 and SSX got huge critical acclaim, I suppose it makes sense that they weren't chosen, as most people would opt for the sequel anyways. There are some omissions that I feel are somewhat curious, though. Star Wars: Starfighter would've been a great cantidate (As it's a very good game, not selling worth squat now on the PS2, and a price reduction would give a great selling tool, saying you'd be paying about half the price for what's virtually the exact same game that's only recently hit the XBox and PC). Ditto for Silent Hill 2 and Onimusha. I only hope Ico gets a second chance a year or so down the line, and with better box art- it really deserved better sales than what it got, and cutting the price in half would help defray the fact that it's such a short game. Actually, there were a number of games that got largely ignored in the huge flood of PS2 games this holiday season, and I hope the Greatest Hits thing does well to reliven their sales. Meantime, I'll be watching out for my cheapass copies of ATV and TMB... 2/25/02 - What to say? Tim's been very industrious lately, so for at least a week, we'll have strips regularly again... how weird is that!? Let's just hope I don't screw up and update late... like I'm doing today... In other news, Capcom revealed it's extravagant plan to lose money in the form of a really awesome-looking mech game for the XBox called Tekki. Sounds good, right? Well, the game is set to come with a friggin' huge 40-button controller with lights and crap on it- When they call this game a mech sim, they're not kidding. Just looking at the thing, you know the game/controller combo will probably cost boatloads of money, and in the end will be targetting a somewhat specific audience- a plan that worked great for Konami's DDR and Beatmani, but that didn't do too well for many others (Despite great reviews, Samba de Amigo was never a killer seller, and does anyone remember the excersize bike game on the SNES?). In any case, it's likely the game won't be coming Stateside, which is kinda' a pity, because it does look very intruiging. Meantime... ehm... I'll be playing Tony Hawk and Maximo. See ya'! |
 Tim's Clever Banter Ah, rejection. How I've missed your spiny, venemous touch! *cries* Well, there you have it. Evangelion is pretty much DONE. Hope you're HAPPY!! I know I AM!! ...Really happy! ...Really FREAKIN' happy. Happy. Happy. Joy. Joy. In videogame news, Xenosaga was unleashed upon the nation of Japan yesterday to takai sales and nagai lines. Sugoi, ne? Except for the fact that the game seems to be more anime than game and there are load times (GASP)! LOAD TIMES!!!! Oh well, there's still plenty of time to fix in time for the U.S. release. There also seems to be a whole bag of games I should be getting right about now. Maximo, Super Mario World GBA, Rez, State of Emergency, Zone of the Enders GBA, Gran Turismo 3 now that it's a Greatest Hit... umm..am I leaving anything out, Jake? I'd love to get some of these fresh new games (well, okay, not really FRESH... one's a remake, two others are sequels, and the others are billed as "old-school" but...shut up) but the thing is, I'm STILL loving the games I got last year. Speaking of last year's games... well...
Report to the petunia at once, corn cob. Man, that felt so good. Anyway, as you can probably tell we're nearing the end of the Evangelion arc. Yeah, I know what your feeble minds are thinking. "What?! Mognet updated?!" ...As for you other people, you're probably thinking "What?! They're finally leaving Evangelion?!" Well... yeah, it's almost time for that. Now you gotta wait 20 more years for the NEXT arc! BWAHAHAHA!! *bonk* Ow... Anyway... I guess it's time to rant about stuff now. For one, Memento got fucking SNUBBED in the Oscar nominations! Anyone who overlooks that film is A BLITHERING IDIOT and deserves to be SHOT IMMEDIATELY. EXECUTION STYLE! AAAHAHAHAHA!! ... At least Lord of the Rings got a whopping THIRTEEN nominations, most of them it will most likely win. It's a shame Viggo Mortensen wasn't nominated for the Badass Award. Oh well. It's also a shame that Jennifer Connelly wasn't nominated for best actress. She's been ignored far too long, and if you've seen Dark City, Requiem for a Dream, or A Beautiful Mind you know what I mean. ...Hey, whaddya know! Memento got nominated for best screenplay and best editing! .........Yay! Wow, I was pretty angry in the beginning there. Must be my lack of sleep. Bitch bitch bitch bitch... Man. Us artists are wacky. We also tend to be full of ourselves. Heh. HEH HEH!! HEHEHEHEHEEE!! AAAHAHAHAA!! ...I think I'll go sniff some more coke now. Jake, be sure to keep that adrenaline syringe handy. *merrily whistles off to his bedroom* ...
...
*thud*
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